Very many years ago, a group of well-intentioned and fine purposed Ugandans left their day jobs (or whatever they were doing) and decided to rise up against the order of things. Between February 6th 1981 and January 25th 1986 these individuals were involved in what we now call the Ugandan Liberation War.
Many years after the liberation, one would assume that we as Ugandans have enjoyed substantial freedom and liberty but Alas!! A good number of us are still bound and probably still need liberation.
Before anyone can place a phone call to General Edward Kalekezi Kayihura to come pick me up for insinuating that the liberation war was a waste of time, allow me explain myself. You see, until everyone is liberated, no one is liberated. For this reason, I shall go ahead to mention a some groups of people who I think need some kind of liberation.
Traffic Policemen from the white mischief
Once upon a time, our traffic policemen had no business worrying about what they look like or how they dress. They simply woke up in the morning, washed their faces and hit the streets to start directing (or misdirecting) traffic. Life was pretty simple. Then there was this thing called CHOGM. It changed the way cops carry themselves around. The introduction of the white uniform is something that has bound these cops for several years now. Gone are the days when a cop would wear his uniform for an entire week and not worry about having to wash it. White uniforms are not only sent from hell but they also seem like Satan’s outfit. Cops need to be free to go days without washing. They need to be free to use water and soap sparingly. I call upon responsible authorities to start the liberation of the cops now.
This is Sadia Alli, a traffic officer at Kabalagala
The Youth from themselves
The Youth of today are a force unlike any other. We are powerful, noisy, intrusive, and meddlesome and have the worst communication skills. Not many of our kind are interested in writing full sentences or speaking correct English. What is the use of writing full sentences when one can simply use shorthand to communicate with the world? After all, we need to save up on letters because it seems apparent that someday the alphabet will get used up and we shall have nothing left to use. So yes; save up on the letters. What a load of animal droppings! We have decided to become so pathetic, so much that the statement ‘we are the leaders of tomorrow’ has been drowned by ‘we are our own worst enemy’. Someone needs to sit down and map out a proper liberation plan that will free us of ourselves because as it is right now, we are safely chained to a post that we have very carefully crafted on our own.
People from their friends
Friendship is a very good thing. In fact, friendship just might be more awesome than that other bogus feeling called sexual attraction. Friendship is the universe’s way of showing you that you are not an island and therefore operate in tandem with others of your race. However, human beings have forever continued to misuse and abuse this otherwise sacred institution of friendship so much that it is now hard to tell who a true friend is. Every now and again you will meet a human being doing wrong things, not because they are not aware but because their ‘friends’ suggested these things. Groupies are turning out to be the greatest sources of wrong and often dangerous advice so much that they need to be disbanded. When lovers are going through a rough patch, the friends on either side are usually quick to cash in and dump whatever bogus advice they have picked up along their own miserable lives onto the two innocent lovers. The result is usually an increase in divorce and break-ups simply because people are busy listening to their friends and not to their own hearts. We each need to be liberated from ‘friends’ who could easily lead to our destruction.
The Human Race from Faith Based extremism
This might be a little too much to ask for but wouldn’t it be nice if human beings did not practice all these extremities that come with following certain faiths? I know for a fact that there is no legitimate faith that will condone killing innocent people or rubbishing another faith in the name of advancing its own principles. True, it may suggest that one spreads the word with more vigour but it will not recommend that one ends another’s life just because they do not agree with them. I think human beings need to stop killing each other in the name of the faith they subscribe to. If I do not agree with your opinion or faith, surely that should not be reason for you to end my life. Besides, when you end my life, what chance do you have of converting me to your wonderful faith? We need to be liberated from the chains that bind us and refuse us to listen to people of aberrant belief.
I am no expert at liberation. In fact, I am bound to, and by so many things that I think I need to see a liberation shrink. However, I also know that if there is to be any liberation for me or anyone of my race, the first thing is for us to admit that we are bound. Only then shall we begin to think of ways to curve a path out of this bondage.
“Those who do not move, do not notice their chains.” ― Rosa Luxemburg
The Talkative Rocker
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