Serpentine Valentine

As is the tradition with the human race, around this time of the year, there is a euphoria of sentiment spearheaded by individuals seeking to find validation for the otherwise meaningless relationships they are in. This attempt to seek for validation has been summed up in a custom that has now come to be known as Valentine’s day. True, there are several tales about how the day actually came into existence but the general idea is that on this day people can finally put into practice the several ‘I Love You’ allegations they have been making.

I_love_you_by_PambaThe time to make good on those words has arrived

To many people, Valentine’s day is a day to be sweet, romantic, loving, kind and extremely passionate to the person you claim to be in love with. While this is the general rule, there are some folks who are no less than serpents and their behaviour and code of conduct prior to, and on this day, is nothing short of demonic. They are out to make it terrible for the rest of humanity and since there is no Government legislation or UN ruling against people behaving like serpents, they go ahead to rip out people’s hearts left right and center all in the name of Valentine’s Day. Today however, we uncover these individuals who practice serpentine valentines.

The Brutal One

There are women who are out to fleece men and clean their bank accounts dry on Valentine’s Day. First, there is a promise they put out to the man – a promise that they just might give in to his advances. So she keeps him around at least until Valentine’s day. On this day, the man will take her out and foot all bills – hoping that this might as well be his last day of begging and imploring and spending way too much. At the end of the night after she has gobbled down 82,000 /- worth of food and drink and has depleted his account by a whooping 140,000/- in transport and other expenses, it becomes apparent that he might have to drop her off at her house. Her reason? Apparently ‘she wants to take it slow’. Serpent! If she wanted to take it slow, she should not have given him all these go-ahead signs that included the provocative short dress and delicious seasoning in the name of make up. Also, she would have probably turned down the expensive meal in favour of something simple and less expensive. It doesn’t get any more brutal than that.

Gold_digger_by_Lysol_JonesNational Gold Diggers Day 

The Two-timing One

The general trend with love and life is that men tend to have a liking for more than one female. While some men hold it off and stay true to one woman, some other men give in to the liking and pursue both. Women have since tipped the scales and are now in position to have two or more men too. A good number of women have actually made it their life’s plan to have more than one man and have each of them foot whatever bills come her way. On Valentine’s day she will spend half the day with one man and spend the other half with the other man. The one whose spending is more impressive will probably get to eat the proverbial cookie. Now if the cookie is going to go to the highest bidder, one may as well hang a price tag on her mid section so that everyone can know how much they must part with so they can get in on the cookie.

sb10064861z-001Beware – lest you get the shock of your life!

The Heartless one

Valentine’s day is a day when even the toughest and least emotional of people will give in to the confusion of love. It is a day when men prove to women how deep their love goes. And usually men do exactly that – they do all sorts of things to make the point clear. Occasionally a lady will smile and nod with gratitude or appreciation for the expensive dinner or dress. However there are those who will simply carry on like nothing happened. According to them it is the man’s duty / responsibility to do these things. They will keep reminding the poor man about how there are suitors waiting in line in case he does not up his game. As much as it may be true that the line behind him is long, there is really no need to give a brother too much pressure. Why be so heartless? Why?

the-avengersEven if the line has all these four waiting, there is no need for the pressure

The Social One

For the most part, a relationship is supposed to be an affair between two adults. At any one moment, only two people are supposed to know the details of, or to enjoy the benefits of a relationship. But of course there are instances where one of the people feels they need to share it with several other people. There are those females who have made it their life’s purpose to share details of their relationship with friends and family, so much that the man walks into a room full of her friends and they instantly start bickering – about him. Worse still, on this rather special day when it should be the two of them giving each other company, some of the females will show up with two other friends. And then the guy will have to foot an ugly bill because, well, he is being nice to his woman. And if she does not bring her parasitic friends along, she will spend half the time texting with those same friends. Your social skills are appreciated but how about some time for the man? He is footing the bill after all, the least you can do is give him some attention.

dATEPut the bloody phone down!

Go on and enjoy this week my friends. It is the week for lovers. And while there are many women who have been brutal and mean to men over the years, the same applies to men. This time round, make the day count, treat her nice, talk to her, make her smile and let Cupid’s arrows do the rest of the work for you. Enjoy the madness of Valentine’s day all of you. If like me you do not believe that much in Valentine’s day, you are welcome to join me on the balcony of this apartment called life. Let us watch the rest of humanity become gooey on each other. For those who are side dishes, there is a wonderful way to enjoy this Valentine’s day after all. Just read a piece that I wrote sometime last year : Power to the “Other Women” on Valentine’s Day

“If every lover was treated like they matter — everyday; valentine’s day wouldn’t be so ‘special.” – Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Bernard
a.k.a Beewol
The Talkative Rocker
Follow @beewol on Twitter

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